2005

This is the time I get all sentimental and give my feelings and reflections on the last 12 months. I remember thinking on new years eve 1979 how old I would be in the year 2000. 28 seemed SO old to an 8 year old. I remember going through each year from 2000 to 2010 and actually saying how old I would be each year. I have no idea why I did it or even why I remember. I don't remember all the thoughts I had about 2006, turning 35, what my job would be, even though I think it turned out pretty well. This past year: I went skiing A LOT without breaking anything or blowing out my knee. I bought a really cool ski jacket for a killer price. My new year resolutions for 2005 were: 1. Lose weight 2. break my addiction to p-nut M&M's 3. Stop playing so much XBox 4. Get out of debt How did I do, still fat, probably because of the p-nut M&M's. I don't play near as much xbox, I actually dont even have one at the house. I'm still in debt. Not as much, but still there. I don't think I expected to get out of debt in a year, so at least we've made progress. 2 outta 4 ain't bad. I may even let them all ride for 2006. My old Laptop caught fire and blew u p. I got a new one. It's been grand. Napoleon Dynamite was close to the stupidest movie I ever saw. (Attack of the Kille Tomoatoes wins first place.) We went through the pain of a miscarraige. Enough said about that. My pastor of my childhood and my boss retired after 30 years at Trinity. I can say with all confidence I learned more about life and ministry from Don Davis than anyone else on the planet. If I can be half the minister He is, I'll do well. I've never known anyone who cared so much about people and showed in in such a humble way. I got some new toys and saw Gas go from $1.80 to $3.00 and almost back again. Speaking of Gas, I still have to get one of these. I found out what to do with snot (sick). Even though I avoided injury during ski season, I made up for it while rafting the mighty Nantahala. I blew out the knee and spent 3 months in physical therapy. I won't have to worry about the 2006 ski season because I'm grounded. NO SKIING for a YEAR!! oh well. I really got into blogging then out again. I went from playing the traffic game to posting once a week. A lot has changed, a lot has stayed the same. God is still here and making Himself known in amazing and mundane ways. No telling what the future holds, but it will be fun finding out. I hope you had a great year and your next one is rather productive.

Sad Days

My uncle passed away suddenly yesterday. His wife, children and grandchildren will have to face a difficult Christmas. Death is part of life but that doesn't make it easy. We look for ways to deal with the hurt and lighten the pain, but I think we have a God who can take our pain, anger, sorrow, sadness, questions, and doubts. It's not faith that keeps us from dealing with the hurt. Faith allows us to be real and honest with our feelings and know that whatever I think or say, I am still loved by the one who created me. I'm going to the funeral and my words of encouragement will have nothing to do with him being in a better place, even though that may be true. My words will hopefully lead them to take off the "strong" mask and fall into the arms of a God who knows loss and gives peace to those in need, even when answers aren't enough. If they don't want to fall in His arms, mine will be there.

Black Coffee and Goody's Powder

Back Coffee has the to be the worst chaser in the world to Goody's Powders. Yuck!

Something In the Air

No, it's not the feel of Christmas nor the pungent odor of Jeff's flagulence, at least not yet. It's more than that. In SC, the weather is hot and rainy. Days are shorter and things aren't as joyous as you'd expect. It reeks havoc on those who deal with mental illness. So many factors play into mental health and for the majority, overcoming circumstances that aren't "pleasant" may be tough but do-able. For many others, that just isn't the case. I've been told that brain chemicals have a lot to do with one's mental state and at times, the misfiring of electric impulses sends mixed signals to the pleasure and problem solving centers of the brain. Sounds reasonable. Instead of joy, one feels loneliness, instead of unconditional love, one feels a need to perform up to self inspired standards of performance. It heightens a sensation from over achieving and euphoria to deep depression. Where is this coming from? I have a wife who suffers from Bipolar disorder. After many doctors and medication, we've come to a semi-normal (if there really is such a thing) state that enables her to enjoy a fairly good quality of life. Weather and time changes play a big part in her mental well being and I seem to see more and more depression in people I care about. Right now, My wife is doing ok, but many others are not. We're not talking about "just snap out of it" or "have more faith" or "You're too blessed to be depressed." I AIN'T goin' there. This type of mental hardship is only hightened by circumstances, not caused by them. If you happen across this blog and are stuggling with depression, anxiety, or mania, feel free to leave a comment. I've found blogging to be very theraputic to some.

Tryin something new

I'm going to try typepad for a month, see how I like it. Check out the new blog.

wide awake

I could not sleep last night. I've had several nights in the last week like this. Racing mind, weird dreams, but last night I decided to just stay up. Kim was wide awake as well so we made an interesting trip to walmart @ 1am. The only reason it was unusual was b/c we haven't done the 1 am walmart trip since college. 24 hr walmart to a college student is AMAZING even when you don't have money. Everything was normal last night. Almost every employee was getting ready for the sale that was to take place a few hours ago. I really wanted the new Garth Brooks Box set. they weren't out yet. We got home around 2. Kim stayed up to meet her mom on the shopping spree before daylight, I watched vh1 child stars until I finally fell asleep. Kim got home from the mad thanksgiving rush a while ago. KMart, Walmart, and Kohl's. She said it really wasnt that bad. Kohl's was the worst. She even went back to Walmart to get something mom couldn't find across town. I asked if she saw any good fights. No dice. Everybody was nice and kind. I remember being very young in Covington Georgia. We were visiting my grandmother and walmart was NEW. I saw to old ladies fighting over a cabbage patch kid. They were punching, pulling and scratching. Ever since that traumatic event, I have been terrified of shopping on the day after thanksgiving. At least that's my excuse. I have a lot of things that need to be done today, but as for now, I'll sit in the reciner with peppy, watch some DVR-ed tv and finish my coffee. Chores will wait.

Thankful

It's been a really tough few weeks. Late nights, little time with my wife, a lot of stress, work and personal. It was nice to leave it all behind today. We went to Dad's about 9:30, fried a turkey, visited and ate til my tummy screamed for mercy. More visiting and home for a quick nap. We left to go to the inlaws for more food. I've got a new brother-in-law. A welcome addition to the holiday. I can't help but think about what I'm thankful for. So much. It has made for a relaxing and restful day. I'm off tomorrow and I have a million things to catch up on. Yard work, shed cleaning, car cleaning and much more. Tonight, I'll watch some tv and remember a day to be thankful for.

Quotable

"I'll be honest with you. I don't know how honest I can be with you." - Nicole Kidman in The Interpreter

Photo Friday

Topic: WORN

Jarhead Review

Ah Jarhead. What a loser. I'm glad I went to the matinee. This was definately NOT what I call a "War" movie. I really need to watch some John Wayne or something. It will probably win all kinds of awards since films are moving to this no ending, real life, find meaning in the mundane kind of genre. Well, I think it sucks. Give me Indiana Jones, Lord of the Rings, NARNIA!!! The best part of the movie was Jamie Foxx saying, "oo-rah." Yep, saw that on the preview. Save your money. If you must see it, wait for the dvd, rent it, and see how long you watch. My rating of Jarhead: ah-looooooo-zerrrrrrr. oo-rah.

Thursday Top Five

from Rick Top Five Favorite Movies 5. Christmas Story 4. Sixth Sense 3. To Kill a Mocking Bird 2. Braveheart 1. TOMBSTONE

Fantasy Football

I know Fox Fantasty Football is free, but they suck. Everytime I've taken their advice, I end up getting CRAP. I won my game, but my ringers, the ones Fox said are must plays, did NOTHING this week. Mark Brunnel? 1 pt. Priest Holmes? Oh Yes, a whoppin 4 pts. Even Brett Farve did better than that. My benched Trent Green scored 24. yeah that's right, HE WAS BENCHED. Tatum Bell? 26 pts!!! BENCHED!!! Curses Fox Sports. You said they wouldn't play well this week. I based my decisions on YOU. LOSERS!!! Thank you Fox Sports. You are definatly on my poo poo list.

Photo Friday

Photo Friday: Retro. I call this pic "In a New York Mullet" This is an older post that HAD to come back out for RETRO.

Tire Kingdom

A little over a year ago I spent almost $400 for tires at Tire Kingdom. I was told I'd have free lifetime rotation, balance and Road Hazard insurance. Good deal, right? I went today to get a tire patched and all of them rotated. I picked the perfect time. No one was there. I was the only one. I thought, I am so lucky. God is looking down on me with favor. I left my car their and walked over to Chick-Fil-A. I sat down, enjoyed my number one combo with no pickle and a coke and wandered back to the Awesom Tire Kingdom and awaited my chariot. And waited, and waited, and waited and waited. I still had the only car at the place and there were PLENTY of people working. They just spent more time talking and laughing, probably at my expense. I ended up waiting over an hour for a 15 minute Job. When I asked if they were always this slow the manager told me it always takes 45 minutes to an hour. I told him I would get tires and free rotation from someone else next time. It didn't seem to bother him. So, here it is "Tire Kingdom" I flush you down the throne.

Monday Questionnaire

Got this from Rick, Check out his site, He makes good coffee. Answer the questions on your blog and leave a url in the comments 1) What do you like most about FALL? What do you like least? I like that its colder, I hate we live in the south and it still gets above 80. 2) What is your favorite cold weather meal? PB&J 3) What is your favorite cold weather passtime? PB&J. I like to Ski. 4) What is your favorite holiday TV special? Christmas Story. "You'll shoot your eye out!" 5) BONUS: What are you going to get me for Christmas? A Bag of Rocks.

Photo Friday

Conspicuous.

new ipod?

Every time I watch the news I see how gas prices and heating fuel costs are going to keep on getting worse and strapping families financially for months to come. EVERY Frickin' time I turn on the news!!! Right after I hear this AGAIN, the Today show does a segment on the new Ipod Video. Here's how it played out. Presidential Approval rating down to 39% because of war in Iraq, hurricanes and rising energy costs... Higher Gas Prices and Heating Fuel costs send america into the gutter. Any merrit raises will go to the gas tank. An african american woman saying she can't cut back any more... Oh, my, here's your new hope!!! A NEW IPOD that plays VIDEO!!! You gotta have it!!! I can't heat my house, I can't drive my car, I hate my president because he caused the hurrucanes and started the war, but at least we still have Ipod. Whew, I thought we were really going down the crapper. Thank GOD I have my IPod!!! Give me a break. I'm rebelling. No Ipod for me.

Do you...?

Do you ever feel like a failure? Do you have this uneasy, overwhelming understanding that all things are spinning out of control? Work, Family, Friends, God, all so distant and far removed? Do you ever think you can be doing life better but have no idea how? Maybe just different, but is that a guarentee of better or a set up for worse? Have you ever thought your job is on the line and you're not cutting the mustard? Have you ever wondered why the phrase, "cutting the mustard" sounds so stupid? Do you have ideas that seem great one minute and stupid the next? Has there been a time in your life you've looked back and realized you are nowhere close to the place you expected to be, financially, relationally, spiritually? Do you blog your heart, thoughts, and true feelings only to delete, edit, and candy coat so no one will know what you're really thinking and feeling? Just wondering?

Saturday

Here's what Kim and I did Saturday. Here's what the Papa John's Pizza Delivery guy did. Thanks Mr. Papa John's pizza delivery guy.

yeah, this is just funny

I know you've seen it on the side bar, but I thought it was worth a post. It makes me laugh. It's been a pretty stressful week and it doesnt look like it'll lighten up any the rest of the month. I have one escape. I'm reading the Chronicles of Narnia. The first of hopefully several movies are coming out in December and I want to be familiar with the stories. I also needed a break from some of the more serious books I've been reading. Rick is working hard to get some books read and reviewed, I'm taking a month sabatical from non-fiction. Maybe I'll write some reviews of my own.

Photo Friday

Photo Friday: Dark

My Day

A friend of mine did a photo journal of his day and thought it was a neat idea. People ask me all the time what I do during the day. Today was an unusual one, but I never have normal ones. It all started @ 9AM. I had a meeting with these guys about a mission trip over Christmas Break. I got back to the office about 11, made a few phone calls and ate lunch with my lovely wife who refused to be photographed. She brought take out. Cheeseburger, Raw fries and a coke. We started cleaning my office. THREE YEARS of junk mail and old stuff. I am the most unorganized person in the world. I have NO sense of neatness when it comes to files. Kim came to help. I forgot the "before" picture, but this is the midway point of cleaning. I took two 33 gallon trash cans full of trash to the dumpster along with about 10 boxes of old clothes, computer parts, sports equippment, game console parts and a 13 inch tv. I had to assure my co-workers I was cleaning to clean, not to leave. These guys came by about 2 and gave me a welcome distraction. We ended up here and had some killer stuffed french toast. Nobody in the place spoke english as a primary language and they were probably making jokes about us the whole time I started to get offended until I remembered it was the INTERNATIONAL house of pancakes. Next, we were off for Muddy Mochas and an Orange Crush at the Pavillion Coffee shop. I love this place and I hate muddy mochas but after investing over $3, I dealt with it. It got better. On the way back to the church, we ran into my "I really need a mullet" friend. We got a good photo op and headed back to the church. Check out the 80's mirrowed sunglasses. I predict cotton blazers with pastel tshirts by easter. These guys left and I got back to finishing the job of cleaning my office. If a picture is with a thousand words, actually seeing the before and after first hand would be worth a million words. You would not believe how bad my mess was. I had a counseling session @ 5 and finished the cleaning a little after 6. Here's the finished product. For those who have been in my office over the last three years, BE AMAZED, just don't look in the drawers. That's next week's project. I found out something about blogger's photoshop. It sucks when you post a lot of pictures.

Photo Friday

Burn.

B-52 Bomber

A B-52 Bomber has been recovered from the bottom of Lake Murray outside of Columbia, SC. It crashed during a WWII training flight. Traffic has been heavy since they started bringing it to shore as people stop to take a look, but I don't see many complaining. A piece of history. The pilots of the planes bailed before crashing. I've lived near this lake almost all my life. It was one the made back in the 20's to bring power to Columbia. They routed the river into a huge valley and dammed it all in (kind of like they did on the movie "Oh Brother Where Art Thou.") I've heard about all the houses, cars, churches and graveyards at the bottom. The stories abouth the 300 lb catfish use to scare me. I'd love to see what else is down there.

Photo Friday

Divine

Intimacy

Intamacy is knowing someone fully and being fully known by that someone without the fear of rejection. Relationships built on this principle make up real community. We attempt to only show the part of us we want others to see, the best or the worst is saved for few individuals or none at all. We are not real, but counterfeits, seeking what we will only attain when we let down our gaurd.

Photo Friday

Photo Friday: Massive

Fitting Quote

I couldn't help but post this. It's from a book I have not yet read, but it's next on my list. The picture of the church in the Bible is a messy one. Why? Because community is messy. The lies our culture wants us to buy into are not new. The church has struggled against them since its birth. The mess happens when people who are not like each other begin to do life together. We soon realize that community requires us to fall at Jesus' feet and beg Him for the love it takes to obey the "one another" commands. We find we often have to ask people to forgive us because we have not served and loved them the way Jesus wanted us to. (p. 162 Jesus In the Margins by Rick McKinley) Check out a full review on the book here.

We're Helping

Our church has been asked to host a triage center for Katrina Evacuees. We should see over 1000 people come through over the next week. Most will have family members in area hospitals. We're just a stop over for most. They'll be going to area motels for the extended stay. How long is extended? Who knows. I hope we can make a lasting impact on some people.

New Orleans

I just saw on the news that many New Orleans Police officers have walked off the job and two have committed suicide. Shoot outs over interstate bridges and crime running rampant. British Students made it back home from the superdome. They said the situation was horrifying. My heart breaks for all of these. Now we're on to the finger pointing. I know there are things to fix and words to hand out, but I don't see how this is helping to do anything but slow down the process and change the focus of view off of the people who need the most help. Around 6000 victims are coming to Columbia, SC over the next several weeks. Our church is trying to help. If local Red Cross chapters are helping in your area, considerhelping them. If not, please consider giving to the relief.

My View

This is my view for 4-6 hours a day. this contraption bends my leg. I'm up to 120 degrees. 10 more to go. I can go back to work in 4 days. This hasn't been the vacation I thought it would be. I really wish I could help the people suffering from the hurricane. I have no money to give, just prayer. Maybe I can do more later.

Good Day

Physical Thereapy was tough but good. I'm still ahead of the game and should be walking without crutches in a week. I came home and did ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING the rest of the day. Sleep, a couple of tivo'ed Star Trek's (TNG) and still a couple of new dvd's to go. Same agenda tomorrow except I'll add trying to venture out to church tomorrow night. We'll see.

I'm NOT a middle man

I was injured while on a youth retreat therefore I am covered under workman's comp insurance. This is great because the out of pocket expense for my surgery and therapy would have been HUGE. The only problem I'm having now lies in being the middle man. Dr. Office people do not like to talk with insurance people and have placed hte burden on me to get my WC Insurance to fax information to them. My WC agent has faxed it twice and no one in the DR. office has recieved it. It seems to me, and I may be naive, that if I were a paid professional trained to deal with medical charges , billing and insurance companies, I would not want to leave the the responsibility of collecting funds in the hands of a pain stricken, drugged up, angry surgery patient. I would probably bend over backwards to work with an insurance adjuster, who is obviously A LOT nicer than an over weight, angry, whining, pain stricken mountain of a man who doesn't care what time you get off. In all of this, I have found out I am not a middle man. If this bill is going to get paid, they've got to get together and work it out. In the mean time, I'll sit here in pain with one more thing to gripe and blog about.

I Know, It's gross.

It's hard to be stuck in one place when you're use to so much more, but it hasn't been all bad. I've caught up on a lot of rest, CSI, Star Trek TNG, Law & Order, some great bible study and some wonderful time with my wife. She's the GREATEST. It's going to take longer than I thought to get back to work, but I'm keeping busy with some neat gadgets. I get to spend 6 hours a day in a bending machine thingy, Yeah, it has a name, but I call it a thingy. I set it to bend my knee to a certain degrees and it slowly moves it back and forth. I'm on it 2 hours at a time. I also have the gadget called an "Empi." It has little electrodes I hook up to my leg. It gives the muscle a shock, causing it to tighten up. It's like exersize without the exersize. I do that 4 times a day for 30 minutes each time. Throw in physical therapy 3 times a week and my recovery is going pretty well. I heard some more evidence of my group becoming a biblical community. Oh yeah, I'm stoked. oh yeah, if you click the pic it gets prettier.

Photo Friday

Chaos. I know this is the same pic I posted a few day ago, but this definatley fits the topic. Surgery went well, I'm just grouchy and in pain. Pray for my wife PLEASE!

Getting my affairs in order

I have knee surgery scheduled for 9:30 in the morning and I've been preparing for 2 or 3 weeks of immobility. I did yard work this morning since I couldn't see the collies in the back yard. All the paper work from church, couseling for the next 3 weeks and wedding plans (I'm officiating, already married myself), wednesday and sunday stuff covered, and Star Trek TNG all tevo'ed. I'm actually looking forward to the break. I say that now, I won't be to happy by lunch time tomorrow. I've been doing some inductive bible study on counting the cost of being a true disciple of Jesus. I hope to post more on that over the recovery time. Man, have we missed the boat.

Who Would Win

Who would win in a fight? Lindsay Lohan or Hillary Duff? Let's Get It On!!!

Photo Friday

Photo Friday: ONE. The One and Only BOBDAY!

introducing the next anorexic lipsync princess.... HILARY DUFF!! Oh yes, she'll follow in the footsteps of Lindsay Ho-han and Ashley Pimpson. I saw her on the Today show this morning. I was mesmorized by her talent and poise. uh, yeah, that's it. I give her 2 years and she'll be like brittany and christina. I REALLY HOPE she proves me wrong. So who's your favorite faker, uh i mean pop star?

Are we going the right way?

I don't think this is the way we were supposed to go down the falls. Oh yeah, I'm the old bald guy. My red hat floated away, but I felt like Indiana Jones when It floated over to the side 50 yards down the river. We eventually got everyone back in the boat. OK, one more thought. Comment spammers SUCK. Leave a name loser. (all spam comments are deleted)

Alexander the Queer

I watched Alexader Tonight. I thought it would NEVER END! Here's my review. One good fight scene, that's all. Very little history. Pushing a homosexual agenda. Pretty lame. My disdain for Colin Farrell has grown a hundred fold. Val Kilmer as King Phillip: he ain't Doc Holliday, but ok none the less. Nobody dies better. The cover advertises "Faster Pace..." I'd hate to the see the slower pace. The best part of this movie was the ending credits. On a scale from 1-10, I give it a 1.2.

Whatcha Listenin' to?

Got this from Rick. List ten songs that you are currently digging. It does not matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they are no good, but they must be songs you are really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your blog. Then tag five other people to see what they are listening to. I'm an avid XM listener and I don't always remember what I'm listen to, but here goes. 10. Dave Matthews - Where are you going 9. Anything Cold Play 8. Anything Lighthouse 7. Jeremy Camp - Beautiful One 6. Jeremy Camp - My Heart Goes Out 5. Avril Lavigne - Nobody's Home 4. Anything except live Maroon 5 3. Jason Morant - Love Song 2. Stellar Kart - Livin on a prayer 1. Hootie - One Love I think I'll tag Rebecca, Cliff, Kirb, Cousin Eddie and Bert -

How did I do that?

I tend to be accident prone. The latest delimma includes a torn medial miniscus and a blown ACL in my right knee. How did I do that? Hmmmm, as always, with my kids from church. I was guiding a joint 7th and 12th grade white water rafting trip down the mighty Natahala River in the NC Mountains. I've guided before, a number of times. The main rapid of the river is the last one, a technical series of turns ending with a straight trip down the falls. No problem. Well, I didn't make the last turn. We hit a rock, 2 kids fell out. I tried to quickly pull one in but not the right way. I was leaning backwards of the with my right foot lodged between the thwart and bottom of the raft. I turned sideways and pulled as hard as I could. I got twisted and the weight of me, the student and the rushing water was too much for my knee stretched across the back of the boat. I heard and felt the "POP." It would have been the equivalent of someone clipping me on the inside of my knee. I couldn't pull up any more so I had to let the student go, I had to let go and we both went out of the boat. As I was floating underneath the boat, I gave it a hard push so at least it went straight down the falls. No one else fell out. I took the falls without the boat, missed the throw rope that was 2 feet away, and floated to the first takeout. Wow! I knew something was not right with my knee becasue it felt real wobbly. The Nantahal is a year road 42 - 45 degrees and I think that helped. I ruled out the ACL as a problem, sucked it up, spent the rest of the trip taking it east, Drove the bus back home, then went to the Urgent care center when I got home. Urgent care, there's a joke. I was pretty swollen. They took an Xray and made me wait an hour to tell me it was probably sprained. "Wrap it up, take some vicoden and if it still hurts in 2 weeks, come back." NO, It still hurts, something POPPED! That's not a sprain and I ain't waiting 2 weeks to find out something else is wrong. I asked the DR what the xray showed. She said it showed some swelling. DUH. I didnt need an xray to see it was swollen. I made an orthopedic appt for the next day. Waited a week for the MRI and another 3 days for the results. I'm sitting in Dr. Presnal's office and he pulles out the mri. Shows me the cartilage and says he can fix it. I'm thinking 2 weeks and back to normal. He then tells me about the ACL and refers me to another dr. Within the hour, my mission trip to Bangledesh and my whole ski weason is gone. OUCH. Surgery next week, 2-3 weeks on crutches, 6 months before I can do any sports. Sucks to be me, but I'll deal with it.

Photo Friday

Photo Friday: Violet OK, I know it's blue, but I'm colorbind. It looks the same to me. Deal.

Happy Stinkin' Birthday

Everybody sing with me. Happy Birthday to me, I blew out my knee. I have to have surgeree Happy stinkin' birthday to meeee. Yeah, it's official, I have a blown ACL and torn cartilage.Surgery is scheduled for August 24. 6 months until I'm back to full strength, I'll miss Bangledesh and Ski season. What a GREAT birthday present. If anyone wants to give me $ or a new IPod, It would make things A LOT Better.

Youth Minister Charged

A local youth minister has been charged with the rape of a 13 year old girl. It allegedly happened in 2002 in another city. The girl is now 17 and has just come forward. I'm bummed about this. His church has faced allegations with a deacon who was a youth worker some years ago. I know the news will run with this and the public will make their minds up, but here's the bottom line. It doesn't matter if he's guilty or innocent. His youth ministry career is most likely over. I'm going to be praying for him either way. This hits way to close to home.

Chris Porter

Chris was a childhood friend who is suffering from terminal cancer. Join us in praying for a miracle.

Million Dollar Baby. YOU SUCK!

I'm watching Million Dollar Baby. This movie SUCKS! What happen to winning? This better get better. I already see it's not going to end the way I expected. Too much like life. I watch movies to get away from reality. I have to finish watching it because it has to get better. dang it! I just finished it. Oh, I know not! You've got to be kidding me. What is the point of this idiotic movie. You think this makes it better? Oh no. I'm ticked. I feel cheated. What happened to epic endings. I need to go watch Cinderella man or Rocky. All I know is that THIS SUCKS!!! Hey movie people, PLEASE DON'T MAKE THIS A TREND. Oscar my BIG FAT HARRY BUTT! YOU SUCK!

Photo Friday

Complex

Why do men have nipples?

I saw this on Today Show this morning and it answers some interesting questions. Why is yawning contagious? Why do beans give you gas. Why does sweat stink? Where does morning breath come from? If you're on a deserted Island, is it better to drink sea water or your own urine? OK, SICK! Interesting questions, and I haven't read the book, but I have some questions of my own and I wonder if they're addressed. 1. Why can you pee without pooing but you can't poo without peeing? 2. If 4 different colored shirts are laying out on the bed why does the cat pick the one you were going to wear next to shed all over? 3. Why do women who stress over thinking they're fat have to eat to cure the stress? and finally, 4. Why do old men fart while peeing in public bathrooms? Makes you go Hmmmmmmmmmm.

Best and Worst Actors of 2005

This came from one of my amazing students. THe Credit goes to Cliff. I laughed HARD. Enjoy.

Now presenting for the first time anywhere ... The Best and Worst actors and actresses of 2005 thus far ... on the 'worst scale' 5 is less worse and 1 is the worst of all. And on the 'best scale' 5 is the least best and 1 is the best of all.

Let's get started ... I'm kind of excited ... maybe not ...

The Best of 2005 ...

5. Scarlett Johansson (The Island)

She is ... wow ... Well done Scarlett ... Well done. I really want to give you the highest title because you're so ... wow ... but you haven't really acted in many movies that were actually good ... but a thousand cool points for being you.

4. Johnny Depp (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory)

And no acting training at all ... and of course you're an even cooler pirate, so that earns you at least a thousand cool points ... you've recovered well from 'Edward Scissorhands' and 'Blow' ...

3. Nicole Kidman (The Interpreter)

Awesome job in 'The Interpreter' ... it was good stuff ... all around great ... except 'Bewitched' almost lost you a spot in 'the best' and earned you a spot on 'the worst' ... but 'Cold Mountain' and 'Eyes Wide Shut' were amazing.

2. Will Smith (Hitch)

Funniest movie of the year ... by far ... (haven't seen 'wedding crashers' yet) Just take down a note to self ... stop rapping, I suck at it ... But you're still awesome because 'I Robot' was grand.

1. A tie between Dakota Fanning (War of the Worlds) and Ewan McGregor (Robots, Star Wars, and The Island)

Good job ... 3 hit movies thus far ... and of course you're Obi Wan ... so that's like a thousand cool points. Also ... grand job in 'Moulin Rouge' and of course 'Big Fish' ... but no cool points for those.

Dude ... you're like 10 and you're a major actress who plays roles opposite people like Denzel Washington, Robert DiNero and Tom Cruise... you rock my face off ... four thousand cool points for being so amazing ... also ... incredible freaking job in 'Hide and Seek' and 'Man on Fire' ... and of course talking like you're 30 in interviews.

And now ... the Worst of 05 thus far ... ( I love that word 'thus' ) It was definately more fun doing the worst of 05.

The Worst of 2005 ...

5. Will Ferrell

You're such a funny guy ... but 'Kicking and Screaming' and 'Bewitched' stick to straight slap-stick comedy ... like ... 'Anchorman' but not 'Old School' ... a thousand cool points for 'Anchorman' but a thousand lost for 'Old School' ... better luck later on.

4. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

Yeah adultery isn't cool ... and who runs around on Jennifer Aniston??? ... and if you want people to go to your movies don't pull crap like this ... just be yourselves ... act ... if you act, they will come ... Brad you were great in 'Legends of the Fall' and of course 'Oceans 11' ... Angelina ... what can I say ... you were never good at anything except incest.

3. Tom Cruise

No such thing as 'chemical imbalances' ... you're a moron ... I thought you were great ... 'Top Gun' ... 'Jerry Maguire' ... 'Samurai' ... and then scientology crap totally took over ... get a pen and paper ... note to self ... never yell at Matt Laur, he's smarter than me ... good luck Katie, marrying that psycho-billy ninja is going to be a crazy ride.

2. Hayden Christensen

Episode 3 was definately an improvement for you from Episode 2 ... but man ... awful ... 'Life as a House' great job ... 'Shattered Glass' not so much ... maybe you have the Star Wars curse ... but hey ... still a thousand cool points for being Darth Vader.

1. Jude Law

Come on! ... You had 3 chances ... and bombed all three ... That makes you the worst actor of 2005 ... listen ... take some time off ... read some scripts ... and then make an informed decision ... because you were great in 'Cold Mountain' and of course 'Enemy at the Gates' ... note to self ... stop fooling around with the nanny ... you lose a thousand cool points.

And now I have to put in one last horrible actor ... because let's face it ... it's easier to bash them than encourage them ...

The Worst Actor of ALL TIME is ...

Keanu Reeves

'Constantine'? ... are you serious? ... and of course you just annoy me ... so that earns you the title of 'Worst Actor of ALL TIME' ... congratulations ... stop acting ... Also: 'The Matrix' wasn't even that good.

ok guys ... I've given you my opinion on the best and worst actors of 2005 thus far ... give some feedback ... especially if you disagree ... because I could be horribly wrong and not realize it until you say something ...

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