Wednesday, November 3, 2004

The Day After

No surprises on the elections, and really no comments beyond only waiting in line for 45 minutes and being a part of the silent majority that did not have his civil rights violated by poll challengers and broken voting machine. My experience was quite nice, spending quality time with my wife shooshing me in line while talking on cell phone about crooked democrat union scare tactics. My biggest struggle today is with myself. I am my own worst enemy. Lead me not into temptation because I can find it just fine on my own. Over the last several days of fatigue and thinking, "that stupid extra hour sleep didn't work," I am finding myself relying MORE on God to sustain and keep me from myself. I have had times of the ungodly attitude, part of the old nature that use to never care if it was right. I'd just argue until somebody gave up. I guess God's allowing the tests to peel back the onion layer so I can see me. I stink. Thank God He's not through with me. My prayer has been, "Transform and Renew Me." I complain, but I've been at this long enough to know this is a good time. Testing and learning to not trust the selfness of me is a good thing. I'm looking forward to seeing all that HE is doing in me. In the mean time, I'll try not to rip heads off, show people they are #1 with the wrong finger (what, I use my pinky, but it still has the understood meaning of the real wrong finger in my head), nor sigh my world famous Jeff Stilwell sigh when asked to inconvenience myself. I'll stick it out, enjoy relying on God, kicking myself for the sin of my stupidity, and waiting for the sight of God's transformation. l8r

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