Coffee filter postal despair

Monday, Monday. I overslept this morning and woke up panicking about what day is it and how late am I. Then I realized it's Monday and other than paperwork and planning, my schedule pretty clear til lunch. I have a lot to do, but nothing too pressing. The workaholic mentality kicks in, then the guilt of being a workaholic. I'll finish this, skin the head, hop in the shower and get to work by 10. Does anyone else ever have a problem separating coffee filters? I have the hardest time trying to figure out if there is one or two filters and if the thickness leads the brain to think there's actually two, I spend the next few caffeine withdrawal moments trying to separate them. Every time this happens, I think of the possibility of losing my mind, going postal, blasting my Bunn coffee maker with a shot gun only to turn it on myself. My wife awakes. She and the dog look over my mangled body and SCREAM in horror. I break the day dream as they finally come apart and my shaking hands scoop the grinds half in the filter and half on the counter and floor. Oh, Thank God my bun coffee maker only takes 3 minutes. Ahhhh, my addiction is fed. (I promise, this sounds much more dramatic in my head).